The Enemy is the Way

So, I’ve been sitting on this thought for a while, but after hearing Sam and Shaan talk about how revenge can be an amazing motivator for founders on My First Million, I knew I had to share my perspective.

Let me take you back to Year 9. I was deep into a gaming session when my parents walked in after parent-teacher interviews. My mum was in tears. She wouldn’t even look at me. My dad, visibly frustrated, broke the news:

“Your math teacher said you weren’t smart enough for 3U Maths”

(For context, math in our school had four levels: General, 2U, 3U, and 4U—for the crème de la crème of math students)

I was stunned. And furious. This teacher was just writing me off. I wasn’t trying—I mean, it was Year 9, the unofficial “doesn’t matter” year of high school. But now my parents thought I was stupid, thanks to one offhand comment.

From that moment, I vowed to get my revenge.

The next year, I climbed my way into the top math class. But even there, I couldn’t catch a break. If five kids were talking, guess who got called out? Yours truly. I was still at the bottom of the “top” and yet another teacher writing me off. That just fuelled the fire. I wanted to prove them wrong.

By Year 11 and 12, I didn’t just recover—I dominated. At the awards ceremony, I bagged 12 subject awards (where most people received 0 or 1). I crushed 4U math and landed in the top 5. Did I care about the actual grades? Nope. Or what I could do with them? Not really.

I just wanted to see those teachers’ faces when I walked on stage.

And I did. Revenge was sweet.

Over the years, I’ve told this story a few times—how revenge lit a fire under me when nothing else would. But I always felt a little alone in that perspective. Hearing Shaan and Sam share their stories? It was like someone finally validated me.

Revenge has been my secret weapon in every chapter of my life:

• My first startup? Revenge against my university “friends” who mocked me for being a “loser.”

• My second startup? Born out of the pain of my first technical co-founder ghosting me. I spiralled into self-doubt but clawed my way back to being the kind of founder no one could ghost.

Even today, I find myself fuelled by these mini revenge arcs. Recently, I went on a coding frenzy—building and moving to open-source tools because I was done with paying for overpriced subscriptions. Yep, I coded my way to petty revenge.

Enemy is the Way (in Africa)

One of the coolest things I’ve learned over the past few years, especially from my work with Caleb Maru and EntryLevel’s incredible customers across Africa, is how central the idea of an enemy is in Nigerian culture:

• “My enemies have succeeded” → A painful acknowledgment of failure.

• “May your enemies never see your downfall” → The ultimate blessing.

And here’s the twist: sometimes your enemy isn’t a person. It’s something intangible—fear, procrastination, self-doubt. The thing standing between you and your next level.

So, as we head into 2025, let me ask you this:

Who or what is your enemy?

I know for me in 2025, it’s my ‘old’ self. The one who didn’t take care of themselves.

Here’s to an amazing New Year, and… may your enemies never see your downfall.

Until next time,
Ajay

P.S This doesn’t mean revenge or enemies are the only motivation but it’s a cool little thought experiment to light a fire under you. I’m sure there might be better ways to motivate yourself but I think this is just an underrated one! (That people are afraid to talk about)